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              找找時間

              2019-5-20 13:59| 作者: 李娜|編輯: admin| 查看: 3850| 評論: 0

              “時間都去哪了,還沒好好感受年輕就老了……”

              一不小心過了兒時幻想的年紀。今天,清閑下來,要仔細找找我的時間都去哪了。

              一閉眼,第一時間浮現出來的自己竟是與現在差距最大的樣子:超短發,背心、短褲、大汗淋漓,處處是疤痕的腿上還帶著沒結巴的傷,小學二三年級火柴樣兒的胳膊已經可以投三分了,清楚的記得教練給我一百米掐表的時間14秒2!球場上發出的每一個笑聲都能響徹籃球場的每一個角落,“快傳我!傳我!”幾乎成了女籃的口號。想想那些與籃球有關的日子,翹課、看球賽、淋雨、騎單車、野炊,猛然地還會想起父親大熱天經常帶著墨鏡,領著又高又大的軍犬在球場邊吼我,記憶中已抹去了他的聲音。看來,這就是我最開心最充實的記憶了。

              品一小口茶,好濃,幾乎刺激到了我的腦神經。父親在作息管理上十分嚴厲,七八歲的我要每天凌晨5:30起床去郊外跑1000米,這個習慣一直“被堅持”到高中,也是在高中才明白父親一直把我當成2008年奧運會的“種子選手”培養。我路過無數個未亮燈的家門,見過無數個日出的模樣,嘗過無數晨露雨滴的味道。記憶里從家人口中從沒聽過“愛”這個字,但并不像大家想的那樣冰冷。從姥爺、爺爺那一輩開始就已經是紅色家庭了,家國情懷和軍旅生活從小就是家常便飯,“落后就要挨打”、“勤儉節約,艱苦奮斗”、“身體是革命的本錢”都是家庭日常用語。1995年我還沒坐過火車,京九線全線開通那天,姥爺拿著一張大地圖跟哥哥著說“這里還非常落后,你長大以后在這也修一條鐵路好不好……”,我還清楚的記得他手指頭的位置——陜西。

              那個被父親一腳踢飛的男孩就是哥哥啦,天天叫家長,上補習班還玩手槍,真的很難得撿起小時候曾經天天粘在一起的時光,我嫌他吃的多愛臭美,他嫌我是女生還跟屁蟲,他是我見過唯一一個可以跑步睡覺的人。是命運也是使命,這位小時候貪吃貪玩貪睡的“大神”,后來成為了一名真正的軍人!而我畢業后去了陜西。再見面他是躊躇滿志的事業男,我是堅強獨立的女漢子,更像是多年不見的“老戰友”了。

              能夠將所有回憶都串在一起的人物是媽媽,有很長一段時間家里拮據著生活,媽媽一直鍥而不舍地照顧著生病的姥姥。姥姥年輕時候在農村教中學,一邊帶三個孩子一邊帶學生,那時候教師資源稀缺,學生基礎差,她常說“學生需要愛,尤其是當他們不值得愛的時候”。姥姥身體早早地累垮了,一病就是二十多年,身為老大的媽媽挑起了整個大家庭,集全家之力帶著姥姥從縣醫院看到市醫院,后來又“扎根”式地走遍北京的大醫院,為病情爭得了時間,姥姥今年已經83歲啦!當年她教出來的學生已經徹底扭轉了命運,大家逢年過節來看她,她總要炫耀一翻大女兒的功勞。媽媽的堅強、忍耐和樂觀撐過了那段苦日子,睜著眼睛都能浮現出她開心地從廚房端出香噴噴的菜,后來,只要這些畫面浮現在我的腦海里,生命就是美的。

              再喝一口茶,已經接近茶底。時間跳進參加工作以后的歲月,至今已整整10個年頭。“奮斗的青春最美麗”,這一點一直在我的骨血里深刻體現著。作為一個建設者,“改天換地”就是造福人類的艱苦事業,雖然工作環境惡劣,卻封存著無數感人故事,我深深熱愛著我的事業。2009年,叛逆而張揚的我打包了所有的個性和好奇心踏入了“西漂”旅程,沒有一個親人,就像當年背景離鄉扎根農村的女知青,一干就是4年,連同回京的6年也是一路摸爬滾打,跌跌撞撞,完成了從一名“學生”到“建設者”的蛻變。曾經無數次站在困難的十字路口,如今看到一座座跨山、跨江橋梁,一條條巨龍公路,從無到有,自腳下慢慢升起,自豪和成就感足以消除所有的煎熬和痛楚,給予我巨大的力量。

              星光不問趕路人,時光不負有心人。放眼現代,我驚喜地感受著中國勢不可擋的飛躍,國際地位的提升、科技的發達、生活質量增長如此迅速,在建設領域由中國交建主導建設的港珠澳大橋更是令我瞠目,被英國衛報評為“新的世界七大奇跡”之一。中共中央總書記、國家主席、中央軍委主席習近平在大橋通車儀式上,會見并稱贊建設者:非常了不起!

              可能現在的人越是幸福,越容易追憶過去吃苦的模樣。轉眼,2019年已是建國第70個周年五四運動第100個周年了,當年老一輩口中落后的西部城市,已經列為國家中心城市,升級國際大都市了,我這個曾經的“種子選手”,也光榮晉升為老黨員和團干部了,我們的家,如今已是四世同堂,它繼續見證并承載著歷史,飽含風霜,卻歷久彌新。并肩共筑中國夢,值此風華正茂時!

                

              作者簡介:李 娜,女,中共黨員,本科學歷,籍貫河北邯鄲大名府。2009年到中交第二公路工程局有限公司參加工作,現供職于中交基礎設施養護集團有限公司黨委工作部。愛好文學,業余創作在《二公局報》、《視點》雜志等發表多篇文章。

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